I'm not sure where it stems from....i think part of the reason why when John got this new job, which requires him to travel on a regular basis, i decided i wasn't going to be used to John being away was because i feel that my parents relationship was weakened by my Dad's constant traveling. (sorry for the extreme run on sentence) I don't know if that's true or not, and i know there's more to their failed relationship than that, but i can't imagine it helped. I think you have to work twice as hard if not more to stay strong in a relationship when you are not seeing each other as much anymore. It becomes all too easy for other things to get in the way of having a good strong relationship without travel or distance being a part of it. When i think about what MY experience was growing up i think my mother got "used" to it. Adjusting is normal and a part of life, but i refuse to adjust to the point of being "used" to it or it being "normal."
If i still miss him horribly every time he is gone then it still means that my love for him is strong and real, and it still means i want him being around. I think when you find yourself being used to your spouse being gone, and that is becomes a casual run of the mill experience or even when you find yourself looking forward to it because it means you can have things your own way completely or there's one less person to negotiate with, then you are already on a slippery slope to misery in your marriage and that is one place i refuse to be.
Now, don't misunderstand me. I am not sitting here typing this blog post crying my eyes out because i cannot live without my husband. I do not spend my days thinking "woe is me" or "i'm so alone" (heck, do i need to remind you that i have four very active children at home ALL the time with me?) I can function rather well by myself and am quite independent and i thank and give credit to my darling mother for that. I know how to do many things by myself and if i can't i know how to get the right people to help me. I also am emotionally healthy enough to know that it is what it is right now and that there are many, many, blessings coming from the things we do and sacrifice and this new job where John is working for the church. I don't need a pity party and i know many, many, women go through much harder things and have their husbands gone for much longer periods of time. However, i would prefer him to be here every time i think of him. ;-) I do miss him and all the goodness that is John Morgan. :-)
I mean, look at this guy, (*sigh) He melts my heart and warms my soul! :-)
So anyway, John Raymond Morgan, i miss you to pieces and love you more than anything including, but not limited to:
- Chocolate
- Wheat
- Cheese sandwiches (like Lauren Sturtevant and i used to get in Chamber Choir nights)
- The Color Green
- England
- Cockles
- Branston Pickle
- Yorkshire Puds (yes i know there's lot of food in here, lol)
- Mum's Christmas English Trifle (and we all know how much i LOVE that!)
- Live Chickens
- Any other relative i have
- cleanliness (whew, that was a big one)
- organization (another biggy)
- Wayne's World or Drop Dead Fred
- .......well let's face it, anything really :-)
The rest of this blog is for my husband as he is missing his children so horribly he commissioned a blog about them. Since i didn't want to blog just about them this is the way i have decided to execute this assignment. However, you are all still welcome to keep reading.....
Immanuel has been loyal to his PJ streak and has been faithfully wearing his adult sized Thunder Cats shirt with it occasionally hanging off him like a toga. In fact today is the first day....i think that he has not worn it (even though he has actually showered in there somewhere) and he's actually in regular clothes as we speak. lol.
Eden has been dancing her brains out with Sarah and they have been living it up on the fashion runway of life. They are officially too cool for me. :-) The plus, plus side is that Eden has been super sweet to Sarah, who of course it eating up every millisecond of it. :-) As we speak they are eating scrambled eggs together that Eden made for the both of them.
Sarah has been mildly prideful, but mostly joyful. And i think after a minuscule amount of ice cream on Monday night i have officially decided that ice cream is a poor way for sugar to be administered to Sarah. She has been working hard on her goal of being nice to Jack and helping him, although pushing him off the bed today when he "ruined" her and Eden's dance party was a bit of a set back. ;-)
And last but not least Jack is his usual interesting and adventuresome self. He has been reveling in my childhood bedtime stories each evening and if you look on my FB page you will see a glimpse of what i mean. I don't know if you looked at my page recently but there's a link to a commercial for Target that makes me think of Jack and his sweet, creative personality. The link is also here for your convenience.
http://www.hulu.com/watch/ad/83116/target-video-commercial
Here he is sporting his own pick of clothes for the day, which the pants happen to be the church pants that i always want him to wear, but that he never does because he hates them. He announced that he is going to wear them on Sunday and then hugged me because i'm sure he knew i'd be pleased about his choice. :-)
Here he is in another shirt just 2 mins after the picture above was taken where he is insisting on wearing his shirt backwards because he occasionally likes to look at the picture of the animal on the tag of the inside of his shirt.
I have also been faithful to my PJ streak and have even put them on after showering. Here's even a straggly picture of me......keep those thoughts clean now, lol. ;-)
I love you much, and am REALLY excited to see you tomorrow night and then spend all day in the temple with you the next day. :-) You are good and perfect for me (even when i am mean to you because you've pushed my buttons too much....just don't throw it back in my face eh?) ;-) Come home safely!
